Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Sober January is a disaster.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I party with great urgency now.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
