that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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