I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
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