I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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