Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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