their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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