no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
