My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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