Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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