It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Randomize
