Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
