it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
