last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I think my moral compass just broke
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
