Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
