yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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