Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
