She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize