why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
