Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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