just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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