Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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