Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize
