Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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