She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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