She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
