i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
