SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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