Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
