I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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