So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Someone shattered a urinal.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Randomize
