sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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