Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
