I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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