I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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