so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
this hospital has no fireball
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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