They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
