Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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