you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
