hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
You may now shotgun with the bride
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize
