you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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