so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
