just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
