So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
We don't watch enough power rangers
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
