You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
