the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
All the doctor said was why
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
