she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
