Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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