I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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