I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
They have beer where we have blood.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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