conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize